From the ikon event ‘Yes’ held on 10th February, 2013. By Chris Fry.
Most of us have come this far on the negative. It has served us well. We have used its energy to purge and winnow, decimate and destroy, break up and shut up many, many, tired, tired, double-binding, constricting and restricting systems. We gathered the ‘no’ to our hearts like armour, forged it into weapons and chanted its name on dead-end streets until the fabric of those cul-de-sacs fractured and split open into bright new mornings that shimmered with hope and possibility. We loved the ‘no’.
But this meeting is about what is left.
With your back to the torn cul-de-sac what do you see?
Now I think I want to know if I can say ‘yes’. I want to know if there is anything left to say yes to.
I want to know if I can say yes to the ‘lack’ inside of me that can never be filled. To a war that can never be won. To a desire which turns me upside down and inside out and seeks only more and more and is never enough. A desire that is never fulfilled and eats question after question with an insatiable lust and never gives up on itself, never rests, never wanes.
I want to know if I can say yes to the strange god of the bible who sets his own decay in motion and drags into death with him the suffocating deceptions of wholeness, completion, perfection and peace and comes alive in the smile of a small child and the eyes of an enemy.
I want to know if I can say yes to the new horizon that opens up when we stand together in the aftermath of the death of meaning and find in each other pieces of a fragmented and broken puzzle which never quite fit but make new pictures that dazzle and transfigure us, that inspire us to keep trying, keep moving, keep loving.
I want to know if I can say yes to the horrible beauty of the ‘other’ that brims up inside myself and in each and every other person that I come into contact with and can never be understood or forgiven or healed or categorised but can only be heard and elaborated and moved toward.
I want to know that I can say yes to singing the song of myself in the presence of mystery and ask for nothing but questions that bind me to life which is in the end a life with others.
I want to say ‘yes’….’yes’